furiousgoldfish:

Why do physically abusive parents still think they’re allowed to ask for hugs and expect their children to just accept physical affection after they’ve been violent to them? How on earth can you expect a child to hug you back after you physically harmed them, after you’ve proven yourself to be a dangerous to be close to, how does it even cross your mind to dare try for a hug? 

Of course your child will flinch away and fight back! They don’t know if you’ll try to hurt them the next second, and they know you could because you already did that! And how on earth would they feel comfortable with hugging a person who has caused physical harm to them! Acting like that demands children to erase their memories, their instincts to keep the hell away from physical danger and harm, to put themselves thru fear and anxiety and discomfort just so you could use the same child for punching bag and then be reassured that they’re still a source of affection and warmth? No you don’t fucking do that, you leave the child you hurt the fuck alone, don’t poke them, don’t tap them, don’t get behind their back to scare the shit out of them, don’t hold them down, don’t tickle them, don’t try to restrain them, and don’t you fucking dare think for a second that you have the right to act astounded and perplexed when the kid pushes you away, scowls and fights tooth and nail to get the hell away from you.

You deserved that.